Welcome to the Ultimate Guide to Writing your own Wedding Vows

So you’ve decided to write your own wedding vows

Writing your own wedding vows can be a scary and intimidating task! That is exactly why a lot of couple opt to skip the process entirely, and I get it! If you are not a born writer, or someone who barely passes high school English class, this task can be daunting. I have been to my fair share of weddings, and let me tell you… Those personal vows, you know, the ones that make you giggle and tear up a little… Those are the ones I always remember most!

I will tell you this though, it is so much easier then you think it will be! You are not writing about world history, or which character had the most spunk in the book you just read. Your writing a LOVE LETTER and a PROMISE to the person you love most in the whole world! Which is why, I PROMISE, the process can be simplified!

Writing your own wedding vows to match your partner’s without hearing or comparing notes

I LOVE wedding vows! And I love personal wedding vows because it is all about you and your partner. What makes your relationship special and helps your guest to connect with your relationship in a very special way that the may never have a chance to do again. It’s why they came to watch you make this commitment to one another!

Since writing your own wedding vows can be so intimate and personal, it makes it almost impossible to come up with an exact “fill in the blank” sort of template for writing your own wedding vows. That always leaves the questions of “What is my spouse writing about?” “Will mine be more romantic then theirs?” “What if mine are super short and theirs are super long?”

I have managed to put together some great examples of wedding vows I have heard over the years to hopefully help guide you both through this process. My hope is that, by following this guide, you will be able to “fill in the blanks” and have your wedding vows flow in a personal yet organized way. Not just for you, but also for your partner to have similar lengths and a good balance of both humor and romance combined!

Wedding Vow Templates

Start by writing about how much you have been looking forward to this day

Talk about this time of anticipation!

• What was it like?
• Were you a little crazy?(It’s okay, we all are when we’re planning a wedding)
• What are some events or emotions that happened in the process of this day approaching
• How long have you been planning this day, really?
• Is it everything you ever dreamed?

“I have been picturing this day for the past {insert number} days, and I can’t believe it’s finally here”

“I have been planning this moment since I was a little girl. My dress, the flowers, this venue, and especially the man that would be standing here beside me. Little did I know it would be more then I could have ever dreamed!”

“The day we have both been anticipating has finally come, and we can finally take a breath(or 6) from the whirlwind of wedding planning!”

You are writing these wedding vows to someone you love

Now, close your eyes and think about the person that will be standing next to you.

• What do they mean to you?
• Are they everything you ever dreamed and more?
• How do they make you feel on a daily basis?
• Are they your best friend?
• Why?
• What do they do that makes them one of a kind?

” When I pictured this day in my head as a little girl, I could have never imagined I would be lucky enough to find a man who loves me for exactly who I am.”

“When they say you should marry your best friend, I wasn’t sure what that meant until I met you. You are the one person I want to snuggle on the couch with. Your my first call when I get exciting news! You my go to shoulder of comfort when I need support. There is no one else I would rather spend every day with.”

“Before I met you I was {insert description}. I didn’t know I could be so lucky to find someone who brings out the best sides of me. {Insert best qualities they bring out in you}.”

Write about what made you fall in love with them

Again, close your eyes and picture all those early dating months and try to focus in on some qualities or reasons you fell in love with them.

• Was there something they did that made you laugh?
• Was it a feature about them? Describe those features (Eyes, smile, laugh, awful jokes that could only make you laugh)(Describing features: Laugh – Contagious, Eyes – Joyful and full of passion, ect…)
• Did they do something special? (Bring you flowers, take you somewhere you’ve never been)
• Something you both have in common that is rare to find in another person? (Love of dwarfs, passion for visiting antique stores, a weird collectable)

“I will never forget the moment I fell in love with you, {re-tell the story and how it made you feel}”

“I knew when I looked into your eyes…. {Again, use your own examples here}”

“Your ability to make me laugh never ceases to amaze me, I remember… {Insert a funny story}

Writing your own vows can include things you have taught one another

What are some skills you have taught each other. When my sister and her husband wrote their vows, her husband had such a funny line I will always remember… “Thank you for teaching me how to load the dishwasher like a champ. I will never forget that plates get put on the bottom rack… But I still don’t know where the bowls go” This was funny and personal because it was obviously a moment between them that was special and made a memorable impact to help me connect with their vows.

“You have taught me so much! From {Insert list of examples with maybe a funny one at the end}”

Writing vows of course needs some… Well, vows!

Here is a great time to bring in some humor if you haven’t already! Mention some funny or quirky things unique to your spouse. I LOVE watching the Friends TV sitcom. So much so that it happened to make it into not only my own vows, but also my husbands vows! I promised to be Understanding when he wanted to watch something other then Friends before bed every night. He promised to be more understanding when all I want to watch is Friends before we go to bed at night. This not only made me laugh but it also made everyone of our guests laugh.

“I promise to be understanding when….”

“I promise to learn how to…. (dishes, laundry, painting, hunting)”

“I promise to do the best I can everyday at being the wife and mother to our future children that I can be”

I promise to try and be a better {Insert something your are bad at but are wanting to improve for them. Ex: Cook, driver, cleaner, ect…}

What you most look forward to in your marriage together

Write about what you look forward to most on this exciting journey!

• What do you want your kids to be like?
• Is there something you do now that you hope never stops? (Dancing in the kitchen, karaoke in the car, camping)
• Where will your dreams take you together?

“I hope our kids will be the best of both of us combined, your math skills and my baking skills of course!”

“I look forward to those spontaneous road trips to the middle of no where and stopping at 7-11 for slurpees at 2am.”

“Let’s never stop fiercely loving one another and pursuing our dream of becoming a couple astronaut team”

Don’t forget to say “I love you”

This whole day is about the love you have for each other. So it’s important not to forget this step in the vow writing process! It’s good to end on a more serious note with this one just to be sure your partner knows just how much you really do love them.

“I will always love you because…”

“I promise to never stop loving you no matter what battle come our way”

“Your love means the world to me, and I will work every single day to show you just how much I love you”

Final vow writing tips

I will leave you with these final quick tips to remember as you sit down to write your own vows:

• Remember you are writing a love letter to your best friend, so it’s okay to write it as such

Remember you are writing a love letter to your best friend, so it’s okay to right it as such!

• Close your eyes and envision your wedding day

Imagine, as your writing, as if you are standing at the alter on the day of your wedding and actually saying your vows. It sounds silly, but it does help to play that little clip in your mind.

• Just start writing!

Sometimes when I don’t know what to write, I just start typing about the topic I want to write about and magically, things start pouring out of me! Granted, I am a natural born writer. But this goes for anyone who struggles with procrastination. You just have to start, and the rest will come!

• Don’t overthink it!

Seriously! There is no wrong way to write your own vows! Just like there is no wrong way to plan your wedding day. It is special to YOU. They shouldn’t be the same as anyone else because your love couldn’t possibly be the same as another couples. Just write down how you feel about your partner and what you promise to commit to them in your marriage and you will do great!

Now it’s time to sit down in separate rooms and race to see who can finish their vows first! Best of luck! And don’t forget to subscribe to my mailing list to stay up to date on more wedding planning tips and templates to help you plan your dream wedding day.